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Talking with a parent about driving

Warning signs, how to start the conversation, involving a doctor, small limits, other ways to get around, and when it’s time to stop.

Quick answer

Watch for warning signs like new dents, getting lost on familiar roads, near misses, tickets or confusion at intersections, and ride along. Talk early, privately and respectfully, focusing on safety, not age. Involve their doctor, who may suggest a professional driving evaluation. Try limits like no night or highway driving, and plan other ways to get around. If driving is truly unsafe, it may be time to stop; a doctor’s advice helps.

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Your checklist

  • Watch for warning signs; ride along
  • Talk early, privately and kindly
  • Involve their doctor
  • Try limits and a refresher class
  • Plan other ways to get around
  • If unsafe, act with the doctor’s help

Rather read it? Here’s the whole thing.

Warning signs

New dents or scrapes, getting lost on familiar routes, near misses, tickets or warnings, trouble at intersections or with lane changes, slow reactions, or friends and neighbors expressing concern. Ride along to see for yourself.

Having the talk

  • Start early, before there’s a crash.
  • Choose a calm, private moment.
  • Focus on safety, not age; share specific things you’ve noticed.
  • Listen to worries about independence and isolation.
  • Involve the person they trust most.

Involve their doctor

Vision, hearing, medicines, and memory or thinking changes affect driving. A doctor can check and may recommend an evaluation by an occupational therapist or driver rehabilitation specialist.

Small changes first

No night driving, avoiding highways and bad weather, shorter familiar trips, a newer car with safety features, or a refresher driving course.

Other ways to get around

Family and friends, public transit, paratransit for people with disabilities, ride services, and senior transportation programs. Your Area Agency on Aging can help find options.

When it’s unsafe

With serious memory loss or dangerous driving, stopping may be necessary. A doctor’s recommendation can help. In some states, doctors or family can ask the DMV to review a driver.

Official sources, and where to look

To find your local office, search for:

  • [your state] DMV older driver review
  • [your county] senior transportation program

Pick sites that end in .gov. Official forms are almost always free.

Common questions

At what age should someone stop driving?

There’s no set age. It depends on health and abilities. Focus on safety and warning signs, not birthdays. More ›

What if my parent refuses to stop driving?

Involve their doctor, consider a professional driving evaluation, and check whether your state allows a DMV review. Keep the focus on safety and alternatives. More ›

What are signs an older parent should stop driving?

Getting lost on familiar roads, new dents, near misses, tickets, confusion at intersections, slow reactions, or medical changes affecting vision or memory. More ›

How do I talk to my parent about driving?

Start early, privately and respectfully. Focus on safety and specific things you’ve noticed, listen to their concerns, and plan alternatives together. More ›

What is a driving evaluation?

An assessment by an occupational therapist or driver rehabilitation specialist that checks skills on and off the road and recommends next steps. More ›

Can a doctor report an unsafe driver?

In many states, doctors can (and in some, must) report certain conditions to the DMV, which may review the driver. Rules vary. More ›

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Part of:I’m getting older and tech is changing fastI’m caring for my mom or dad

Not yet reviewed by an expert. Last checked 2026-10-29. This is general help, not legal, medical or professional advice. Rules are different in every state.